Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Terms I Never Wanted Thought I'd Need to Know

PTSD ~ Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Major Depressive Affective Disorder
PIBS ~ Post Institutional Behavior Syndrome
Hypervigilant
Control/Avoidant Behavior
Self-parenting
Extreme Attention-seeking
Feelings of Entitlement
Repetitive Emotional Traumatization/ Developmental Trauma Disorder
Social/emotional immaturity and/or mixed maturity
Extreme emotional instability
Cumulative Cognitive Delays
Abandonment 
Deprivation
Neglect
Maltreatment
Institutionalization
Low self-esteem


We're learning.
Some of these terms are familiar, but others are very new to us.  We have changed some things about our parenting; we have let some things go (including some hopes and dreams); and we are willing to take the subtle and not-so-subtle steps outlined in Dr. Gindis' report once we get it.


I've written and deleted three posts on our visit, and I've come to the realization I don't know enough of what I'm speaking about to explain it...yet.


There is something I do know ~ my God is bigger than all this!  There is no thing and no one beyond His redemptive power.  That, I know.


And there is something I believe ~ when adopting an older child internationally, we aren't just discovering and dealing with the culture of their birth country, but also the culture of institutionalization.

8 comments:

Mama D.'s Dozen said...

Oh my!

Those words are scary, I'm sure. And, I'm sure that if our daughter was evaluated we would hear some of the same (or very similar) words.

Praying that the LORD will give you wisdom and guidance as you process all of this new information. HE knows your son more intimately than any doctor ever will.

Be BLESSED, my friend ... hang in there ... God IS in control, even though your precious son wants to be the one in control.

Hugs!

Laurel

MotherOfTwo said...

There will come a day, when the Lord can deliver him from all of those things, slowly or overnight. Do not lose hope.

Grandma Shelley said...

Lifting you and your family in prayer, Connie. Praying for our Lord to guide you and yours thru this time in your life. Hugs, my friend.
Shelley

Pam said...

Things you never thought would be part of your life, right? Right. I know. I'm there too. :( Hang in there my friend. Prayers for you, him, and the rest of the Krew.

Cari said...

Reading those labels make my heart heavy, but one thing I know Connie is that none of it was a surprise to God. You know where I'm coming from when I say that letting go of my expectations has been a huge step forward for me and my family. You are NOT alone in this journey. God is there to pick you up when you feel like letting go. I'm just an email/text/phone call away when you need a "sister" to pray or just vent. Love ya, girl!

Leveta said...

Connie, So many of these words describe our Sam and I would love to talk to you sometime to find out more about what the dr. told you and find out exactly who you went to for the tesing and see if anything like that is available around here. We have also discovered that Sam has some level of autism..As someone else said this is not a secret to God and I wil be praying for you and for your som and the rest of your family because I know how hard this is on everyone.
Leveta

Jennifer P said...

Letting go of the hopes and dreams is the hardest growing experience I have had. Echoed above, God makes no mistakes and puts the lonely in families. God will bless you as you continue to move forward in those subtle and not so subtle ways. Staying stuck is too hard. Praying for your family as you navigate a new normal.

Rachel said...

Praying that Father will redeem those years and heal deep wounds.

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