His Clock's Tickin' China Time

I'm going to share a little secret, and then you'll have no sympathy for me whatsoever.  My kids have been rockstars about sleep transition after travel.  With the exception of one who had night terrors for six months, bless her, they've all slept through the night from the get-go.  Until now.

We've only been home three days so I realize I need to give it time, but it's getting worse.  We landed in bed at 3:30 am Friday and slept till noon, no problem!  All of us.  Friday night, little dude woke up at midnight, guzzled a bottle, and tossed and turned till 2.  That's doable.  

Saturday night, he woke up at 2, downed a bottle and tossed and turned till 5.  Last night he woke up at midnight and tossed and turned till 4:55.  Not cool.  My alarm rings at 5.

Around these parts when the alarms rings, we hit the ground with both feet and all hands on deck.  I don't know how that will play out today.

I'm desperate for suggestions to help Mr. Cool sleep!  And I'm not beyond medication, people.  When he doesn't sleep, I don't sleep.  He goes to his crib until he wakes for a bottle, and then we're co-sleeping.  But my littlest rockstar is like the Energizer bunny...on steroids.  He can be perfectly still for all of 2.2 nanoseconds, and then he's rolling around, kicking his legs and reaching to hold my hand.  He has to have my hand over his.  Sweet, huh?  It really is.  But he is so tired.  He's really awesome about not sitting up and playing.  I can tell he's frustrated though.  

So, what would you do?  And please don't say skip the nap because I've been letting him nap less than an hour.  And we've been staying up till between 9 and 10, which is so past my bedtime!

We all thank you for your words of wisdom :) 

Sweet Slumber!

Guess who slept in her very own bed ALL NIGHT last night?

Yeah, Kinley Grace!!

We've been co-sleeping since we first held this precious girl because it was what she needed. I have been reluctant to move her to her own bed for fear of disrupting the school kids' sleep...fear that it would disrupt our sleep...and fear that she would hate it.

Last night we made a big deal of setting up her bed. She played in it a long time.

Then I asked four friends to pray for us, got three cups of milk, read a story, prayed with the girls and walked out of the room.

Kinley came through the house twice, looking for me, but went right back to bed and fell asleep.

Don't you love it that God is in ALL the good things, even the little ones!

Still Sleeping!

Well, our third night of sleep training was interesting. Kambry cried for a while but never got out of bed. Finally, she decided she really needed another kiss from Daddy ... and then I never heard another peep! Last night she was reluctant to go to bed, but once I read a story, prayed with her and then summoned Daddy, she was fast asleep. Yeah, Kambry!!!

Guess Who's Sleeping!

Tonight's sleep training took 30 minutes of whimpering, crying, calling for Daddy, Sissy, Bubby, and she was out like a light! Thank you, Jesus!

Always some kind of training

Isn't that just precious! Don't be fooled, this is a rare moment. Let's talk sleep. When Kayden came home at the age of 15 months in 2004 we went through what I'd consider a fairly normal transition. Dad was 'all that,' and I was pretty much good for bottle washing, bathing, laundry ... you know, all the fun stuff. One night when I was rocking her to sleep a few weeks after being home, we had a true bonding moment. I was giving her a bottle and praying aloud (I seriously cannot sing!) in the quiet of my room, when she seemed to melt into my arms, realizing once and for all Mommy rocks ;-) Not long after that we experienced the longest 6 months of our lives. Kayden began having night terrors. We'd read several adoption books, but a lot of the information is irrelevant until you are living it. We were violently awakened by this screaming little girl, and we had no idea what was going on. Her eyes would be either closed or glazed, and she would thrash and cry. Trying to comfort her only seemed to make it worse. The terrors escalated to every 15 minutes, and we were walking zombies, when our social worker came for our 1 month post-placement visit and diagnosed the problem immediately. I can't describe the depth of God's grace during those difficult, sleepless months, but He gave us the patience, mercy and just enough energy to keep on keepin' on. Reluctantly, we put Kayden on a prescription to help calm her in order to develop a sleep pattern. Every few weeks we'd try to wean her off the meds and figure out she needed it a little longer. We'd also periodically try switching her from soy-based to milk-based formula which was a huge mistake. It would take a few days for her allergic reaction to manifest itself, but it was clear she needed to stay on soy. My night terror research revealed there is also a link between allergies and sleep disorders. Hmmmm, feeling like Mom of the Year then! In an effort to try to help my daughter progress and develop, I was only making matters worse. Eventually she was completely off the meds, night terror free and now that she's five can drink milk by the gallon!
When Kayden had been home six months we knew the Lord was calling us to adopt again and started the process for our next child. At that time the wait from DTC to referral was six months, but once we were logged in the wait time began to steadily increase, and our six month wait turned into 16 months (and I am not complaining because folks logged in 5 months after us still don't have a referral). Kambry was almost 9 months at referral and 11 months when she came home. Which brings me to the topic at hand - training. Kambry has never been a great sleeper. I am a 'rocker.' I've always rocked my kids to sleep - they just usually don't require 2 hours of it! I really don't even know how to 'just put 'em in bed.' In April Kambry will have been home two years and we've tried numerous techniques to get her to sleep in her bed. We've let her select her own bedding; stayed in her room until she's asleep (meaning we've fallen asleep on the floor); read several sleep books; tried the Super Nanny approach and a few others. We finally resorted to co-sleeping, mostly because she sleeps very well and we're so tired it allows us to rest. The problem is she won't go to sleep without me! As a working mom and volunteer youth leader who is sometimes required to be gone overnight, I realized this week we have to get to the bottom of Kambry's sleep issue, for her sake (and that of the people who will be keeping her for Falls Creek, other youth events and our trip to China to bring baby sister home).
So, we're on spring break, might as well try some sleep training! Never mind the fact I've had the busiest month at work in years and we just hosted a youth retreat - this girl has to learn to sleep! So tonight went pretty much like this: baths at 7:30; tuck Kaeleb in at 8:15; read a book to Kayden and Kambry at 8:30, and she already knows something's up because she's not in Mom's room. I tucked her in, told her how much I loved her and prayed, then quietly left the room. For the next hour she would cry, get out of bed and walk down the hall. I would silently pick her up and put her back in bed, tuck her in and leave the room. Eventually I could just look at her and she'd turn around and head for bed, crying all the way. Then she came down the hall asking for a drink. Aha! This is a 'normal' bedtime issue - we can deal with this! I gave her a drink, found her favorite bear and listened to her very long story, kissed her and quietly left the room. She whimpered a little, and one and a half hours after we started this process, she was asleep - in her bed! So, I'm not claiming victory yet! I know it will take several nights, and I'm willing to put a lot of effort into it. I pray at the end of spring break we are finished sleep training and getting ready for Kaeleb's potty training - never a dull moment!
Speaking of praises, our APPROVAL did arrive in the mail yesterday and our dossier will be authenticated next week, then on its way to China! I'm still in awe over this miracle!

Training ... of some sort

Hague training has commenced! However, we've decided to direct our attention away from potty training and focus on a more urgent matter - sleep training.
Toddler bed ...
... is made for jumping!
Kambry started out in her new bed ...
... and then, as usual, she wasn't there in the morning.

But Kaeleb loved his toddler bed! (he only fell out once)Okay, so it's no secret that I haven't had an uninterrupted night's sleep since September 2004. First there was the anticipation of bringing our baby Kayden home, then there were the escalating night terrors. It was during this time of rocking and praying her to sleep that we formed a lifelong bond. About the time she developed a good sleep pattern two years later, Kambry was coming home. There's just too much life going on for her to sleep, then came Kaeleb, who is a great sleeper. Kaeleb has been in a pack n' play beside our bed, and Kambry has been in a crib converted to toddler bed, but usually ends up in our bed.

I have always rocked my kids to sleep. I admit I don't know how to just lay a baby down, until Kaeleb, who prefers falling asleep on his own. Right before he came home I was still rocking Kambry, but it would take more than an hour and we knew something had to change. So, Daddy would tuck Kayden and Kambry in, then read two stories, and stay in the room until Kambry fell asleep. Somewhere along the way, Daddy got really tired and Kambry decided co-sleeping with Mom and Dad would be better! I've read Sleeping Through the Night and The No-Cry Sleep Solution

but we decided it was something we could cope with until Kambry started sleeping on her own ... and then God placed Mei-Mei on our hearts, and we wondered if we could really rest with three kids in our room!

We made a big deal about getting Kambry a new bed and moving her old bed into Kolton's room for Kaeleb. We all went together and got the bed, Daddy assembled it and the switch was made (as well as disassembling the pack n' play - yeah!). Kaeleb went right to sleep in his new bed. I tried what I call the Super Nanny approach with Kambry, where I briefly explained it was bedtime and put her back into bed the first time she got out. My daughter is stubborn! I stood right outside her room, and eventually she would see me coming to put her in bed and she'd jump back in, screaming until she climbed out again. She would try everything from, "Mommy, where Daddy?" to "Want Daddy," to "Wuv ooo Mommy." An hour later Daddy said we needed to try something different, so I laid beside her bed and held her hand until she fell asleep. Three hours later she came to the safety of Daddy and Mommy's bed. I admit, I'm no expert on sleep issues, and I've always loved spending those last minutes with my kids before sleep ... so maybe Daddy just needs to get a soft rocker big enough for Mommy, Kambry and baby sister :)