Am I the only one who struggles with not wanting to be broken? Oh, how I want to chase my own dreams. But in my brokenness, the Lord can really speak to me and cause me to move.
When I look around our home and see actual broken things (a doorknob, a bar stool, a cabinet door...) they are tangible reminders of my struggle ~ where I sometimes want to be and where the Lord wants me to be.
While I have a wish list of things I'd like to be different: a house tidied up, a schedule set in stone, some time to myself, a vacation (!!!)...the Lord has something better in store.
Remember the impoverished widow in 2 Kings whose sons were going to be taken as slaves to repay her debt? She pleaded with Elisha, and he instructed her to gather as many jars as she could and fill them with the last of her oil. The oil kept flowing until the last jar was full. Then she had enough oil to sell and repay her debt. But she had to break the seal on the only thing she had left, a jar of oil.
How many times can I truly say I've allowed the Lord to use the last of what I have? When I'm at the end of the proverbial rope, will I still try to fix things myself or give all I have for Him to do as He pleases?
You'd think I'd learn because in the few instances I've given the last, He has blessed me in miraculous ways! Look at the ways He's brought our children home! Totally HIM.
And now the Lord is guiding us in how He's going to heal their brokenness.
We are counting down to two very important appointments ~
Two weeks from today we will be home from Shriner's Children's Hospital in St. Louis with answers about our Baby Joy and the medical special need that has kept her from walking.
And four weeks from today we leave for BG Center in NY to seek answers and equip our Teen Treasure for a life free from the maltreatment of his past that has clouded his vision for the future.
The Lord is even using the broken lives of our children to reveal Himself and His miraculous healing and redemption. Even though the struggle to chase my own futile dreams is sometimes great, I wouldn't miss this broken journey for anything!