humble

The Lord has given me a word lately.

'h.u.m.b.l.e'

It's right up there with other dirty words like 'surrender' and 'submit'.  

Except, I've never had a problem with these words, so I thought.

Have you ever faced a situation that finally wore you to the point of saying, 'whateva'?

And so you did it - you released it!  *sort of*

But actually your heart became hardened and you began responding in ways that surprised even you.

Surely that hasn't happened to you.

For over a week now, the message I've gotten from the Lord is, "humble yourself in this situation...or I will do it for you."

I'm prone to believe a message like that because it's happened before.  When I've made idols and refused to put them in their place, the Lord has taken care of them for me.  It.wasn't.pleasant.

Pride.  Control.  I've been bowing to them.

Thing is, I don't want to be in control.  But my reactions and emotions reveal that I do.  

And what I think is discipline and chaos management really looks like control.  

As for pride, I'm pretty sure I trip over it every single day.

If the Lord sees fit to warn me, I'm willing to listen.  I think I'm on track, and then some silly thing derails me.  Then I lose perspective.  Maybe you know the spiral.  It's like I'm always looking for the next.best.thing. rather than cherishing the already.great.things.  I know He doesn't promise easy.  I know He doesn't usually snuff out the fire, but rather carries me through it.

When I rise up and open my eyes, I see His majesty.

I see hope.
*Hope in the things He is doing in the hearts of others.
*Hope in spring time.
*Hope in a determined little girl who can walk.
*Hope in a bright little boy whose file was days from being returned.
*Hope in a toddler making an amazing transition.
*Hope in a young adult with his whole life ahead of him.
*Hope in teenagers growing into leadership.
*Hope in a whole passel of girls with enough spunk to change the world.
*Hope in The Lord.
Because He knows what He's doing.
He hasn't chosen to change my circumstances, but He has given me given me a glimpse of His handiwork.
Even if I don't receive another blessing, I still have much to praise Him for.  

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.  

James 4:10